Personal About Politics: I'm MIA; Guest Columnist: “From the Mouth of a Neo-Con: The Genius and Downfall of the Republican”
NOTE: On Tuesday I had surgery on my knee. The surgery was fine. The three days of constant nausea and migraines was not so fine. I am doing better now, but realized I still could not construct a complete thought let alone an article, so I called on my son to help me out. Sean is a senior at Columbia University in New York City. He will be graduating with honors in international relations and political science. Several of his articles have been published in various Columbia publications. He sent over the following article for me to post.
From the Mouth of a Neo-Con: The Genius and Downfall of the Republican
By Sean McMorrisI have a problem: I am white, well-educated, business minded, wealthy, and live in the U.S. This makes me a minority in a democracy. Sure, I've done pretty well for myself over the last 250 years, but I could, and should, be doing better. So, I have a plan. I'm going to use my wealth and education to advance my bottom line by taking control of the government.
First, I must accept that the majority of PHD's will not agree with what I am about to say, but that is OK, because they are a minority like me, and my target group is more plentiful and much easier to manipulate. Now I know what you're thinking, but, no, my target group is not the poor. Yes, they are many, but they don't vote so I needn't worry about them. No, I plan to target another group, one that has just as little in common with me, but is even more copious: the middle class. The key, however, is that I will not exploit just anyone within the middle class, only those that are easy to manipulate: the less educated and ideologically grounded.
I know what you're saying, “how do I convince someone who has little if anything in common with me to support my agenda?” It's simple: 1) I appeal to emotion, and 2) I bully. First, I will seek out core groups within the middle class that vote solely on emotion, that is to say one-issue voters – those whose vote is determined by a candidate's stance on one thing only. I've discovered that these people are the extremely religious, the rural gun lover, and the Nationalist. Next, I will adopt these people as my own before anyone else can do so.
Now enter the labels. I am no longer a minority within the upper class business community, but am now the “moral majority” (for the religious), a flag waving “true patriot” (for the Nationalists), and the “protector of freedoms” from those “communists” and “despots” who promote gun control. Once this is done and I have the backing of the emotional majority I am now free to bully and debate without reason. If one puts forth a sound argument against me I will simply dodge the question and invoke an emotional response within one of my core groups. Some good ways to do this are by interrupting, speaking louder, using catch phrases, name calling, and above all, threatening. But I must also have a propaganda outlet in place of news which I will call RAT or WEASAL or FOX or something like that. It must be catered to my emotional majority though, so I will forego reason and simply make it entertaining like Jerry Springer or tabloid news—people will not have to think, just feel.
Once this is all done I am fairly certain I will run the government. With free rein I will now throw my emotional majority (my greatest asset) a bone every once and awhile so as not to alienate them while I allow myself, the white upper class business male, to systematically exploit the country. In order to do this I will first disproportionately cut taxes for myself. Then I will privatize all things federal and pass laws doing away with oversight so that I can profit even more. Next, I will go to war, not once, but twice, in order to allow myself to again profit. I will make sure, however, to invoke my emotional majority when doing so by waving many flags, speaking loudly, making many threats and making sure these wars are religious wars. And to top it all off I will fire any judges that disagree with my agenda and replace them with people like myself.
I must be careful, however, because if I become too arrogant and sick with power I will ruin it all. For instance, it must never be found out that I am gay, have had extra-marital affairs, have cheated on my taxes, am partial to underage boys, was involved in the 1980's savings and loan crisis, graduated bottom of my class, and go to war for profit not patriotism. If this were to happen I would be revealed as a hypocrite and risk losing my very essential emotional majority (…or would I?). But above all, as much as I exploit the international world I must be sure to keep things on the economic home front running smoothly, because if there is one thing that will bring a one-issue voter to his senses it is an economic downturn (…or would it?). If this happens my emotional majority will begin dabbling in reason (…or not) and I will once again become a minority (…or not). This will never happen though; I am sure. I am too smart for that… way too smart.
Cheri Cabot, Politics CorrespondentCheri's column, “Personal About Politics,” published every week, will reflect on how the life of a 59 year-old, middle class woman is affected by politics, policy and the current state of the nation - a look at the personal aspects of politics. The articles will be posted to www.LafayetteGrapevine.com.
Cheri is a freelance writer, living in Southern California. She has two grown children, one in Iowa and one at Columbia University, and is the proud grandmother of two. Cheri is also a purveyor of fine coffee, warm chatter and dry wit.
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